Are you a people pleaser?

When you begin to understand your shortcomings as a man, it starts to change your entire way of thinking about yourself and others. You begin to learn who to value and why, but more importantly you learn to value yourself the most. 

I've spent most of my life being a people pleaser. Not to say you shouldn't do right by people, but stop living your life to please them while making yourself miserable. That's not doing right by you. It turns you bitter or jaded. I would know! 😬 It seems the more I've read recently, I'm not the only one!  The good news is, there's a fix. It takes a lot of effort and I'm not going to pretend I'm there yet either, but putting your needs first is the best thing you can do to begin to correct this problem.  But let's be honest...if you're falling into this category, chances are you've got some other things in common with me. (I mean the old me!)

You may also be struggling with relationships or friendships as well. Always feeling like no one respects you...or at least not as much as you think they should...right?  Oddly enough that's your own ego talking. Shut it down. It's only going to make things worse.  You may think of yourself as a "nice guy"...you're not. Because what happens when you're rejected ("friend zoned")? You become nasty guy. You become bitter, and you turn into the very thing you've spent a lifetime professing to hate...you become an asshole. Why? EGO. It's not just your ego, but that's a big part of it. What else? Well you problably think that doing all these nice things will win you some favor right?  Wrong. It's usually doing the opposite. I know...I didn't wanna hear that either, but it's usually true. So what's the fix? Being honest with yourself is a good start. Now personally, it does make me happy to give and do things for people, and I genuinely like to make people happy, BUT...I can't continue to do that at the expense of my own sanity. If you just agree with everything someone says or wants to do, it makes you a pushover and they'll naturally just lose respect for you. It's not a purposeful thing. It's not malicious. It's just how we're wired. As for other aspects of this...you can't expect something in return when you give. And when you don't get something in return and get mad about it (here comes the asshole again) you can't freak out and act like someone owes you something. They don't. Get over it. No one owes you a damn thing. Period! 

Something to help all of this, and what I've been trying to focus on...discover your purpose. Job, hobby, charity work, whatever! Find something(s) you're passionate about and focus on them. A lot of the issues will begin to correct themselves because you don't have time to worry about anything else!!

I'm writing this for me and anyone else that needs a dose of reality. This is more aimed at guys, but I'm sure the ladies can relate on some level to this.

Here are my takeaways from this...

1. Love yourself first. 

2. Focus on keeping your ego in check. 

3. Discover your purpose and focus on it. 

4. No one owes you anything. 

5. You can do anything you put your mind to. Let the bitterness and negativity go. Let the positive vibes flow. 

Hope this helps someone! It will definitely serve as a great reminder to me. Excuse my ADHD writing style. It's hard to stay on topic sometimes. If you have any questions, text or fb message me and I'll do my best to explain. I'm new to this also, but I've flipped my outlook on life upside down the last month or so and I want others that need it to experience the happiness that this has brought me. 

Been awhile...

It's been awhile since I did one of these so I thought it was about time to go on another long meaningless rant that you can read if you want...or not...don't care. However, for those of you that are interested, hold on...it's gonna be all over the place. 

First up is I think I'm going to try and do some sort of fitness blog from time to time. I'm hoping it'll motivate someone and maybe me at the same time. I've been slack up until this last week really and I need something to push me forward. Maybe try and post some easy exercises for those of you that don't like the gym or go to the anti-fit and anti-gym Planet Fitless. So stay tuned for that...

Next up is life. Pardon me if I'm on Facebook a lot again. Even when I was working (which I'm not at the moment, but don't worry, we'll get there...) I had a good bit of free time on my hands to do whatever, but now that I'm not at all...well between filling out job apps and the gym I guess I don't have much else going on. I don't know why people make such a hot topic of my page though. It's as if they never met me in real life. I'm not much different. People think I'm some sort of angry negative asshole and while I am kind of an asshole these days (sorry/not sorry), I really don't see how speaking the truth makes me negative? I'm a passionate person...maybe too much so.  I find something I feel strongly about and lay into it...apparently that's a bad thing...not sure.

I'm also very impatient, but there's a reason for that. I was once told (after asking a girl out) that I moved too fast...2 weeks...yeah (bullshit right?)...so reason for that is, apparently I have a sence of urgency that others just seem not to...idk? Sorry that I know what I want and you don't, but it'd be nice if I wasn't judged for it. On the flip side of that I feel like I've missed out on other opportunities because of being too shy or scared to pull the trigger...yeah guess I don't know what I want? Or have others just ruined it for me? Guess I should figure my shit out eh?

Here's something that really chaps my ass though...I hate when people say "yeah I'll do (whatever)" or "I'd love to go (wherever)" and then flake the fuck out. I can't stand that shit. I don't like getting let down, and shit like that really lets me down. I'm not sure how to say this nicely, so I'll be blunt...DONT LIE TO ME!! IF YOU DON'T WANT TO DO SOMETHING SAY MF'N NO!!!  I'd rather someone tell me no than say "yeah! Can't wait" the back out bc they meant no all along. Stop lying! Shit! 😡

I'll try to calm down now, but if you've read this far you knew it was coming at some point. Anyway going back to being let down, I grew up trying to treat others how I'd like to be treated...and I feel like I do my best to go above and beyond if needed for anyone I consider a friend. However, typically the favor is not returned.  I don't do it with the expectation that it be returned, but let's be real. People use others all the time and don't think I don't notice when you're trying to pull some bullshit like that on me. I see right through it and I certainly don't like being lied to, it makes me resent you. Stop. For your own good...

Last is my job situation. I left a company after 3 years there to take a job this past Wednesday. Now I'm not going to say where the job is or who this person is, but the entire situation has not been handled the least bit professionally so now I'm completely out of a job. Life is good huh? 😒

Had to get all of that out, I know I bouce around a lot (add) but I'm sure you'll get the gist. Hope the 4 of you that read this enjoy it. It's helped mellow out a little bit tonight. ✌🏻️

-Brandon

Thoughts on Newtown.

I keep seeing all these faces of children all over my feed and it's starting to get to me. I really hope none of you "let's get God out of everything" liberals are questioning where he was on Friday. Mike Huckabee said something last night that was just right on point. I don't remember the exact quote but something about people have worked so hard to get God out of schools and everything else but when a tragedy like this happens everyone questions "where was God?".  its not likely that it was going to stop this lunatic anyway but it's just the fact that a lot of people don't want God around or in their life unless it's convenient or they need something.  I think most of us are partially guilty of this though...Some more so than others.  I'm not perfect nor do I pretend to be but I at least try. Sure when I get angry I have massive outbursts that I'm sure all of you have seen (and surely complained about...you all have flaws too) but I try really hard to keep a Christian based outline for how I live my life and treat others.  Again I'm not perfect and neither are you but at least I try.

As far as whatever his name is.... Being the thinker that I am...I have tried to wrap my mind around how far gone someone would have to be to take such an innocent life. It goes for anyone who has ever murdered a child not just this dude (I don't know his name nor do I want to). There is no way he could have even rationalized this. It was either pure evil or some sort of psychotic break of epic proportions like the guy from CO. Regardless of what caused this, its still sickening and this will go down as one of the most heinous crimes in the history of the United States.

I also keep seeing this anti-gun talk again. Let me see if I can dumb this down so you anti-gun nuts might understand. Making guns illegal only takes them out of the hands of law abiding citizens. I'll say that one more time so you can swallow it. Making guns illegal only takes them out of the hands of LAW ABIDING CITIZENS.  Guess what that means...criminals have guns and the rest of us don't. Who does that put at risk? In case you didn't know....It puts YOU and your family at risk.  People kill people. Guns are not robots. It takes a person to pull the trigger.  The people are the ones that need the fixing... Not the firearms.  With video games, social media, and texting taking human interaction to I'm sure an all time low I'm surprised more kids these days haven't turned into complete psycho hermits. No one has any social skills or sense of reality anymore and yet we wonder what caused little Jimmy to snap and go on a spree killing. Here's a hint... It wasn't the gun. It was his detachment from reality. Sure the gun makes it easier, but I'm sure just as easily you could Google how to make a pipe bomb and do just as much damage that way. Use your brains people.

The thing that bothers me the most (and all of you have been here as a child) is the last few days before Christmas break all you can think about is what is Santa bringing me for Christmas and you are absolutely crawling out of your skin and just can't wait for Christmas day. That's all these kids were thinking about...and it was all taken from them by some loser that I'm sure thought he was going to show everyone how tough he was.  These parents have to look at these gifts they bought for their kids while the selfish killer took his own life leaving no justice or explanation for the victims families.  I'm sure everyone has but please pray for these people. Whatever faith you may have please keep them on your mind. 

KONY 2012...

ok so i just watched the Kony thing...and i have a few thoughts.  while i completely support the idea of getting him arrested its far more complicated than posting a bumper sticker and sharing a video.  if you think HE is the only warlord in africa you're completely ignorant to world wide issues...and if you think he won't be replaced by someone just as nasty you're foolish.  there are rebel groups all over africa that do the same crap as Kony.  i realize its a start but when does it end?  i hate to tell you all but this has been going on in africa for a long long time...and its not just africa its all over the world that rebel groups commit these heinous crimes.  there are militarized groups all over the world kill a lot of people mercilessly that should be stopped...not just Joseph Kony.  educate YOURSELVES on these issues...don't let a video do that for you. read and research...because if you're going to give your heart and soul to a cause you should be extremely well informed...RIGHT?  RIGHT?!

 i'm sorry to seem insensitive to all this because i'm really not, but america has its own serious problems (namely our economy and IRAN...among others) and unless these same people stand up and do something about OUR issues at home we're not going to have one.  this country is being ruined by shitty gov't and shitty greedy ass people.  why aren't "we" standing up about our own nation?

by all means support this cause because its a great cause...but your efforts for our own country should be just as concentrated.  i'm not trying to sound self centered here but there comes a time where you have to focus on YOU...or else YOU might not be around anymore.   think about it...

i hope none of you take this the wrong way as me being insensitive but i'm just trying to be real here.  maybe this will open some eyes and i'm sure piss a few people off....but this needed to be said.

-b

uhh...milk is bad...mmmkkayyy?

tried to post the graphic but as usual nothing works like it should...anyway go visit this link http://www.naturalnews.com/035130_raw_milk_infographic_pasteurized.html

basically talks about the SHIT that is in the milk we drink, feed children, etc...its definitely worth looking at if you care about your family!!!!

this is a really good article i thought i should share with everyone..

this article was written primarily about cancer...but there are some benefits to reading regardless of that....a lot of people don't realize how they're poisoning their bodies...maybe this will help a few of you.  i had already begun making changes to my diet, food choices, food prep, etc... before reading this article and now i'm going to make even more.  its kind of long but its well worth the read...ESPECIALLY if you have kids!  people wonder why things like ADD, ADHD, Autism, birth defects, Depression and other terrible things run so rampant these days...well I have a feeling a lot of it is to do with our diets and the god awful garbage that is in our food!  Pesticides are known to effect human behavior and unless you eat organic you are probably ingesting them.  all this fake sugar is nothing but chemicals...i could go on but i'll spare you.  just read the article!

-B

Johns Hopkins Update  This is an extremely good article.  Everyone should read it.  AFTER YEARS OF TELLING PEOPLE CHEMOTHERAPY IS THE ONLY WAY TO TRY ('TRY', BEING THE KEY WORD) TO ELIMINATE CANCER, JOHNS HOPKINS IS FINALLY STARTING TO TELL YOU THERE IS AN ALTERNATIVE WAY .  Cancer Update from Johns Hopkins: 1. Every person has cancer cells in the body.. These cancer Cells do not show up in the standard tests until they have Multiplied to a few billion. When doctors tell cancer patients That there are no more cancer cells in their bodies after Treatment, it just means the tests are unable to detect the Cancer cells because they have not reached the detectable Size. 2. Cancer cells occur between 6 to more than 10 times in a person's lifetime. 3. When the person's immune system is strong the cancer Cells will be destroyed and prevented from multiplying and Forming tumors. 4. When a person has cancer it indicates the person has Nutritional deficiencies. These could be due to genetic, But also to environmental, food and lifestyle factors. 5. To overcome the multiple nutritional deficiencies, changing Diet to eat more adequately and healthy, 4-5 times/day  And by including supplements will strengthen the immune system. 6. Chemotherapy involves poisoning the rapidly-growing Cancer cells and also destroys rapidly-growing healthy cells In the bone marrow, gastrointestinal tract etc., and can Cause organ damage, like liver, kidneys, heart, lungs etc. 7. Radiation while destroying cancer cells also burns, scars And damages healthy cells, tissues and organs. 8. Initial treatment with chemotherapy and radiation will often Reduce tumor size. However prolonged use of chemotherapy and radiation do not result in more tumor destruction. 9.. When the body has too much toxic burden from Chemotherapy and radiation the immune system is either Compromised or destroyed, hence the person can succumb To various kinds of infections and complications. 10. Chemotherapy and radiation can cause cancer cells to Mutate and become resistant and difficult to destroy. Surgery can also cause cancer cells to spread to other sites. 11. An effective way to battle cancer is to starve the cancer Cells by not feeding it with the foods it needs to multiply.  *CANCER CELLS FEED ON: A. Sugar substitutes like NutraSweet, Equal, Spoonful, etc. Are made With Aspartame and it is harmful. A better natural substitute Would be Manuka honey or molasses, but only in very small Amounts. Table salt has a chemical added to make it white in Color Better alternative is Bragg's aminos or sea salt. B. Milk causes the body to produce mucus, especially in the Gastro-intestinal tract. Cancer feeds on mucus.. By cutting off milk and substituting with unsweetened soy milk cancer cells are being starved. C. Cancer cells thrive in an acid environment. A meat-based Diet is acidic and it is best to eat fish, and a little other meat,  Like chicken. Meat also contains livestock antibiotics, growth hormones and parasites, which are all harmful, especially to people with cancer. D.. A diet made of 80% fresh vegetables and juice, whole Grains, seeds, nuts and a little fruits help put the body into An alkaline environment. About 20% can be from cooked Food including beans. Fresh vegetable juices provide live Enzymes that are easily absorbed and reach down to Cellular levels within 15 minutes to nourish and enhance Growth of healthy cells. To obtain live enzymes for building Healthy cells try and drink fresh vegetable juice (most Vegetables including bean sprouts) and eat some raw Vegetables 2 or 3 times a day. Enzymes are destroyed at Temperatures of 104 degrees F (40 degrees C).. E. Avoid coffee, tea, and chocolate, which have high Caffeine Green tea is a better alternative and has cancer Fighting properties. Water-best to drink purified water, or Filtered, to avoid known toxins and heavy metals in tap Water. Distilled water is acidic, avoid it. 12. Meat protein is difficult to digest and requires a lot of Digestive enzymes. Undigested meat remaining in the Intestines becomes putrefied and leads to more toxic buildup.  13.. Cancer cell walls have a tough protein covering. By Refraining from or eating less meat it frees more enzymes To attack the protein walls of cancer cells and allows the body's killer cells to destroy the cancer cells. 14. Some supplements build up the immune system (IP6, Flor-ssence, Essiac, anti-oxidants, vitamins, minerals, EFAs etc.) to enable the bodies own killer cells to destroy cancer cells.. Other supplements like vitamin E are known to cause apoptosis, or programmed cell death, the body's normal method of disposing of damaged, unwanted, or unneeded cells. 15. Cancer is a disease of the mind, body, and spirit. A proactive and positive spirit will help the cancer warrior be a survivor. Anger, un-forgiveness and bitterness put the body into a stressful and acidic environment. Learn to have a loving and forgiving spirit. Learn to relax and enjoy life. 16. Cancer cells cannot thrive in an oxygenated environment. Exercising daily, and deep breathing help to get more oxygen down to the cellular level. Oxygen therapy is another means employed to destroy cancer cells. 1. No plastic containers in micro. 2. No water bottles in freezer. 3. No plastic wrap in microwave.. Johns Hopkins has recently sent this out in its newsletters. This information is being circulated at Walter Reed Army Medical Center as well. Dioxin chemicals cause cancer, especially breast cancer.Dioxins are highly poisonous to the cells of our bodies. Don't freeze your plastic bottles with water in them as this releases dioxins from the plastic. Recently, Dr Edward Fujimoto, Wellness Program Manager at Castle Hospital , was on a TV program to explain this health hazard. He talked about dioxins and how bad they are for us. He said that we should not be heating our food in the microwave using plastic containers. This especially applies to foods that contain fat. He said that the combination of fat, high heat, and plastics releases dioxin into the food and ultimately into the cells of the body. Instead, he recommends using glass, such as Corning Ware, Pyrex or ceramic containers for heating food. You get the same results, only without the dioxin. So such things as TV dinners, instant ramen and soups, etc., should be removed from the container and heated in something else. Paper isn't bad but you don't know what is in the paper. It's just safer to use tempered glass, Corning Ware, etc. He reminded us that a while ago some of the fast food restaurants moved away from the foam containers to paper The dioxin problem is one of the reasons.  Please share this with your whole email list.........................  Also, he pointed out that plastic wrap, such as Saran, is just as dangerous when placed over foods to be cooked in the microwave. As the food is nuked, the high heat causes poisonous toxins to actually melt out of the plastic wrap and drip into the food.. Cover food with a paper towel instead.  This is an article that should be sent to anyone important in your life...

this is why i don't miss living at home...

Brandon Smith hahaha where'd you get a picture of my rape...err...free candy van??about an hour ago · Like

• Ricky Townsend You look like you would own a van like this^^ @ Brandon smithabout an hour ago · Like

• Brandon Smith ah is that so?about an hour ago · Like

• Ricky Townsend ‎@brandon Berrett ., WTF I thought I had my shit private :) I can handle the lady's comments., but if theres one thing I hate it is a comment from a random ass dude..,, gaaahhhhhh,,,, HotDamnabout an hour ago · Like

• Brandon Smith it was shared on my page...i thought it was someone else's picture...slow your roleabout an hour ago · Like

heres where it gets fun...

• Ricky Townsend Who are you??? I see you go to a gym . Do you fight!!!, or train to fight??58 minutes ago · Like

• Brandon Smith nah i got too much on my plate for all that...i'm not against it i just don't have time to do it right if u kno what i mean.56 minutes ago · Like

• Ricky Townsend Lame,, I have more on my plate thn a fat man can handle., and I make grown men cry everyday.., TeamTheBarracksMMA..,, shape up my friend.., don't get lost tryn to keep up!!!,47 minutes ago · Like

• Brandon Smith oh you're one of those guys...the billy badass type? haha i'm not even gonna give you the satisfaction bro...take your tapout shirts and go hassle someone else.44 minutes ago · Like

• Ricky Townsend ‎:) one of those guys!!! Yup Yup, that's me.,, @Brandon Berrett, you hear this guy!!.,,, he wouldn't dare stare into my eyes and say that!! This is what coach talks about.., posers""" play with ur guitar a little more homie., and get the fighter off your layout., like I said,, off my page dude,, no room for you here!!30 minutes ago · Like

• Brandon Smith the fighter? do you even know who that is? and you're right i wouldn't i don't pick on people smaller than me...and really if you were a badass you wouldn't have to brag about being a badass. and considering your whole page is full of bragging i'm pretty sure you're over compensating for something. since you don't appear to be too bright i'll explain...that means you're the poser. and btw Arnold was a bodybuilder, not a fighter dipshit. let me give you a word of advise...just because i won't take the time to break your jaw doesn't mean someone else wont...so all this bullshit you're preachin' over here you better be able to back up. i'm telling you that because i feel like being nice tonight and since you're probably too dumb to figure it out. you seem like the type that would start shit at a bar for no reason...its people like you that get shot and stabbed because not everyone plays by the rules...life isn't an octagon and some thug you start talkin shit to at a bar isn't gonna pretend it is...as for me...just because i don't train to fight doesn't mean i can't fight...so instead of judging me (since you don't know me and all) why don't you just stop talking before you embarrass yourself even further.21 minutes ago · Like

• Brandon Smith and that 'guitar' as you call it (or bass) has gotten me laid more in a year than you've been in your life...so yeah...i'll keep playin! its called TALLENT bro...you should get some! ;)19 minutes ago · Like

• Ricky Townsend Talent is fighting in front of 40,000 ppl., not playing solo at jack rabbits.. And pussy??? Ahahahaaa., ur ugly dude., no pussy for you..,12 minutes ago · Like
• 
  

Brandon Smith how many times you fought in front of 40k people? yeah...didn't think so. i've been on stage in front of 3,000 on a couple different occasions. i'm willing to bet your fat ass hasn't fought in front of 40. and ugly? has your goofy lookin ass looked in the mirror lately? oh and by the way i wouldn't be caught dead in crack rabbits or the rockhouse wich it seems you frequent...those are what i like to call REDNECK bars...and they are crawling with douchebags such as yourself.

and one more thing...i get mine...don't hate cuz you can't get anything other than maybe some fat girls which don't count bc fat girls will fuck anything. now again, quit while you're ahead because i'm really getting bored with embarrassing you.2 minutes ago · Like


there was more but i didn't feel like copying...